Intimate relationships are inherently difficult. But why? One of the major influences on my grappling with this question, as a therapist and in my own marriage, has been Stan Tatkin's work. This short and entertaining Ted Talk below gives a brief introduction to some of Stan's ideas about how the challenges couples face are rooted in the way our brains and physiology are wired.
If you'd like to learn more about Stan's work, I recommend these materials of his:
Wired For Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style can Help Difuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship. (book)
Your Brain On Love: The Neurobiology of Healthy Relationships (audio recording)
And if you want to explore some of the ideas he presents in real time with your partner, please contact me. I'd be happy to talk more about my work with couples.